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Detailed Strip Info
What do those real estate terms actually mean?
strip info approved by DaveKellett
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NARRATOR (decoder): (more) Real estate jargon decoder
"It's immaculate!"--Previous owner was super type-a.
"Ample closet space!"--It is PAINFUL that this is the best feature we could talk about.
"Back on the Market"--What has two thumbs and couldn't close the last deal? THIS Guy!
"Built by famed architect Johann Düfenbüfen!"--Hey,look! It's some dude you never heard of!
"Enclosed carport!"--Turns out we're not legally allowed to call this a "REC room".
"This kitchen is a chef's dream!"--...But every other room is a living nightmare. Like, H.P.lovecraft kinda stuff.
"We're 'spouses selling houses'!"
I'm super creepy to look at, so I make sure to include my wife in all my promotional materials.*
*Or it could be a model I hired for the photographs. You'll never know.
model (Looking at Real Estate agent)
Real Estate agent
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Outside House (For sale)
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Character Info