try a pilchard-loving black labrador! (no naked lights, please)
The Dales - fingerprint marks where God's hand touched the world
And their only ammo is popcorn.
We finally banned my mom from feeding the dog popcorn when we were around because no matter how much we begged and pleaded for her to stop, she just didn't believe us that it sent the dog (who stinks anyway) into gassy fits.
She finally came around to our way of thinking after one evening at home alone with the dog (us kids were away at college and dad was out of town on business). Mom sat down to watch a movie and shared a bag of popcorn with the dog. Later that night mom woke up gagging as the dog let loose his gassy wonderfulness while sleeping next to her. She practically had to leave the house for the stench.
She doesn't feed him popcorn anymore tho.