Does this mean I get a promotion??

Lookie, lookie what I have in my new office now!!!!

"I know. But just *wait* 'til you see his yarmulke collection."

Optional at the end: "Sha-lom!"

#1

"Shhh! He's going for the world record!"

#2

"I'm pretty sure the company voice recognition program needs an upgrade."

#3

"I REALLY underestimated the creepiness."

#1
He told me the zoo was terrible.
#2
How does he even type?

first entry:

"Well rich lawyers need hawt secretaries too ya know!" (aside- I'd keep the bugs off her back anytime, if you know what I'm sayin'...)

second:

"What no tall leggy blonde? I'm not sure if I should be relieved or worried."

My second one...

"So? Whats your point?"

"...so I started thinking about what you said about more 'diversity in the office', and, well..."

Yeah.

It was... it was a "squee" of ABSOLUTE SUFFERING ... And it came directly from... the seat of... the lovely Miss... Keratin's... chair...

3rd one....

"Dude! This is not what I meant when I asked you for a "horny" secretary!

Ohh Man we got you good! That's Jeff in a rhino suit. Come on out Jeff. Sheldon you should have seen your face.

So who's your new temp agency "Wild Kindom"?

2. ) So the zoo has a work release program.
Who would have guessed?

3.) I know they say that the business world is a Jungle, but this is taking it a bit too far.
What’s next and Elephant in the mail room. No wait that could work.

"Have you met our new rhinotary public?"

1. It's white rhinos that are endangered. White COLLAR, however....

The 80 words per minute one cracked me up... But the first that hit me was:

"Now we've just gotta outsource 100 more of these babies and we're gold. Seriously..." Variations on the words may apply - but its something that I really think Arthur would say. Oh, and also, the "seriously..." should be written as a trailing off small print thought outside the voice bubble.

I might post more later.

Nice use of 'in media res' on #2 there! Made me laugh out loud (and wish that I had though of it!).

"This is what you get when you get a cheap rhinoplasty."

I Googled "Humanely-produced Afro-Asian Aphrodisiacs", and, well...

1. I fired the elephant in the room and hired him instead. He works cheaper and takes up less room.

2. It’s all part of our ongoing plan to replace all employees of Sheldonsoft with animals.

"Snappado!"

"I didn't know they could get wicker from Rhino horn?"

"A room full of Rhinos eventually write Archie comics."

"Snappado!"

"I didn't know they could get wicker from Rhino horn."

"A room full of Rhinos eventually write Archie comics.

Okay.. my final two... *gulp* wish me luck, bloodthirsty competitors *wink*.

"... and that's how I saved the world from the Mongolian Death Worm. Oh yeah, and about the rhino. Nice guy, he's a temp."

I like it for the fact that it doesn't incorporate the picture at all - except that you can imagine Sheldon asking him about the rhino and him going on a long story about saving the world :p.

"He's a terrific accountant, but we're starting to run low on keyboards."

I ran out of ideas lol.

"What's with the unicorn?"