Anatomy of a Vampire - Sheldon® Comic Strip

TITLE: Anatomy of Monsters: Anatomy of a Vampire

DESCRIPTION: A classic vampire - grey crinkly skin, pointy nose, sharp fangs, black hair with a sharp widow’s peak. He is w wearing black pants, white shirt and a dramatic black cloak with scarlet red lining. The collar is tall. His posture is hunched with arms out menacingly.

JOKES:
- When your looks ays “Ancient Aristocrat,” but also kinda says “Magician at a five fear-old’s birthday.”
- This is what you look like when you haven’t slept since the French Revolution.
- It’s a complexion best described as “Uncooked Pie Crust”
- Glides into every room (He’s wearing Heely’s)
- (Pointing to collar) Collar popped so high, it could double as a sneeze guard at Sizzler.
- He’s the final boss of introverts: If you don’t explicitly invite him, he ain’t comin’
- He put ten cents into a bank in 1785. He’s now worth $58 Billion. …if you’re a vampire and you haven’t figured out compound interest, JUST WALK INTO THE SUN.
- The Apple watch heart monitor was a waste of money.

——
Want 5,000 more comics like this? Join us at Patreon.com/sheldoncomics for the *FULL* Sheldon archives, art giveaways, fun community, and more! Sheldon Comics copyright Dave Kellett. Colors by Beth Reidmiller

Mar 18, 2026

Mar 18, 2026

CLICK FOR THE
FULL ARCHIVES

pickles

<img src="https://www.sheldoncomics.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/05/collection_daves_faves.jpg" class="img-fluid" />

<img src="https://www.sheldoncomics.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/05/collection_pugs.jpg" class="img-fluid" />

<img src="https://www.sheldoncomics.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/05/collection_coffee.jpg" class="img-fluid" />

<img src="https://www.sheldoncomics.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/05/collection_pickles.jpg" class="img-fluid" />

<img src="https://www.sheldoncomics.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/05/collection_pop_culture.jpg" class="img-fluid" />

<img src="https://www.sheldoncomics.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/05/collection_literature.jpg" class="img-fluid" />

<img src="https://www.sheldoncomics.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/ANAT-OF-DOGS-1.jpg" class="img-fluid" />

<img src="https://www.sheldoncomics.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/05/collection_anatomy_of_dinosaurs.jpg" class="img-fluid" />

<img src="https://www.sheldoncomics.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/05/collection_anatomy_of_authors.jpg" class="img-fluid" />

<img src="https://www.sheldoncomics.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/05/collection_anatomy_of_animals.jpg" class="img-fluid" />

Web Analytics