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PANEL 1: SHELDON, a ten-year old boy with huge glasses, and bright orange shirt and blue pants, walks on a sidewalk next to a yellow duck, ARTHUR. Behind him is a brown neighborhood fence, with hedges behind it.
SHELDON: THE THING is finally appearing in the MCU!
ARTHUR: Is that the guy from the Fabulous Five?

PANEL 2: Close up on SHELDON, hands gesturing excitedly.
SHELDON: (ignoring that) And now that he’s here, I can finally have the on-screen battle I’ve always dreamed of: A tripartite fight between The Thing, The Hulk, and Spider-man!

PANEL 3: SHELDON clasps his hands by his head excitedly, Arthur stands next to him unsure as to what’s happening.
ARTHUR: Did you use the word “Tripartite?”
SHELDON: Where the only true winner is ALL MY HOPES AND DREAMS.

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PANEL 1: SHELDON, a ten-year old boy sits on a swing set with his pet duck, ARTHUR. A sunny, peaceful sky behind them.
SHELDON: Sometimes I wish telepathy existed, so you could see how much I genuinely like you.

PANEL 2: Close up on SHELDON, excited.
SHELDON: With telepathy, you’d KNOW how great you are in my eyes. You’d never have to feel insecure about yourself!

PANEL 3: Back to SHELDON and ARTHUR sitting on their swings. ARTHUR looks distressed.
SHELDON: But then —eeeeesh— If telepathy existed, you’d see how many times I’ve rewatched “DUNE” (1984) all the way through.

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This is a comic featuring a scene from LORD OF THE RINGS. FRODO is talking to GANDALF. The scene is dark with stalactites from the ceiling and rocks on the ground. The colors are dingy.

PANEL 1:
FRODO: Gandalf, I wish it need not have happened in my time.
GANDALF: So do I. And so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is give us.

PANEL 2:
FRODO looks at GANDALF who has a slight smile. A dim glow emendates from him. No dialogue.

PANEL 3: Gandalf turns.
GANDALF: But yeah…the next four years are really gonna suck.
Frodo looks concerned.

——

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Alt Text Transcript of the Comic:
The comic features an outdoor nighttime scene of a dumpster illuminated by a single overhead lamp. It shows a group of raccoons peeking out from or standing on a green dumpster filled with trash bags and garbage. A rat holding a staff like the character Rafiki stands beside one raccoon,. The tone of the comic is humorous, parodying a famous line from The Lion King.
Text in the Comic:
	•	A raccoon stands on the edge of the dumpster, holding up a baby raccoon  dramatically. 
"LOOK, SIMBA!"
"EVERYTHING THE LIGHT TOUCHES IS OUR KINGDOM."
	•	Two raccoons poke their heads out of the garbage inside the dumpster, and another raccoon peers cautiously around the back edge of the dumpster. They all seem to be part of this "kingdom."

Closing Note:
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Panel 1:
A knight in full armor, holding a sword, stands confidently before a wide-eyed boy. The knight speaks grandly:
Knight: "Hail and well-met, young squire! Today, your questing begins!"
Panel 2:
The knight leans closer to the boy, while the boy holds up a goofy looking green duck.
Knight: "I see thou hast already picked an animal familiar."
Boy: "Aha! 'Tis a good duck! And strong in the magicks!"
Panel 3:
The knight holds a small drawstring pouch, presenting it with one hand as he continues his explanation. 
Knight: "Thou shall keep it in this tiny, enchanted pouch! A slave ever ready for your battles!"
Panel 4:
Close up on the the knight.
Knight: "For ye shall fight the ducks and geese and badgers of other children on thy quest!"
Panel 5:
The knight, now in the background surrounded by trees, dramatically points into the distance, signaling the start of the boy's journey. The boy starts on his journey, looking bewildered.
Knight: "Now, begin walking! Even though you are a youth of ten years... you must walk from London to Rome, completely on your own."
"It makes zero sense, but that's how we do it."
Panel 6 (Final): Yellow background, simple text:
Text: "Pokémon, basically."

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Alt Text Transcript and Description of Comic:
Panel 1:
MACE WINDU (a bald Jedi Master) and YODA (a small, green alien Jedi Master) are sitting in chairs, having a conversation.
MACE WINDU: "So Yoda, where are you from?"
YODA: "Know not, do I. Shrouded, is my past."
Panel 2:
MACE WINDU looks incredulous, leaning forward slightly. YODA continues to converse.
MACE WINDU: "Wait. So in 900 years, you've found ZERO clues where you're from?"
YODA: "Complete mystery, it is. No sources of information, have I."
Panel 3:
MACE WINDU looks perplexed.
MACE WINDU: "NONE? Have you ever tried turning to your left… and asking Yaddle?"
Panel 4:
YADDLE, a female member of Yoda’s species, is seated in the chair to Yoda's left. She looks unimpressed, pointing at Yoda and yelling at him. YODA looks embarrassed and annoyed.
YADDLE: "We're from Jersey, YA DINGUS! I keep telling you!"

Closing Note:
Want 5,000 more comics like this? Join us at Patreon.com/sheldoncomics for the FULL Sheldon archives, art giveaways, fun community, and more! Sheldon Comics copyright Dave Kellett. Colors by Beth Reidmiller